you ain’t sexy, and i know it.

what is it about men that gives them this utter confidence to think they are hot shit and can just do as they please. i am in disbelief right now and hope that i am not the only one. you go out, you meet a guy, you have great conversation, you then give him your number.. if he calls, he calls, if he doesn’t who cares. (at least that’s how i look at it..) so lets just say this guy does end up contacting you the next day…. you exchange a few texts, ya know … no biggie. day two of texting rolls around and after the “hello, how was your day text” you receive a picture.. and no not of him smiling, or of one of those funny/sarcastic ecards that one loves to receive (hint.. hint). this picture was of  him without his shirt on. WHAT THE FUCK? seriously? one, i did not ask for you to send me this picture, two i could have definitely done w. out it, unless you are sporting a six pack that looks absolutely delish (please refer to picture A below), then do not send shirtless pictures of yourself to anyone besides yo mama – unless, of course one asks for them.

the worst thing about this entire situation, is that this isn’t the first time a guy has done this. just because a girl has a conversation with you, DOES NOT MEAN SHE WANTS TO BONE YOU. i can’t grasp the way a man thinks. i just don’t get it. am i crazy? is it me who feels that this is completely uncalled for and out of line? are girls doing this? are they just sending pictures of themselves half naked saying “hey check it out, i just went HAM at the gym,” cause if they are, ladies please put your shirts back on and take one for the team. if i see one more unattractive picture sent to my cell phone i might have to gouge my eyes out.

picture a:

sexy six pack ryan gosling

point is, if you look like this, then please mass text me every shirtless picture you take. but if you don’t, then keep it to yourself. THANKKSSS.

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toast to the assholes.

why does chivalry have to be dead? sometimes i wish we were still in the 1950’s when men opened doors for a lady and not because they wanted to get in between their legs but because it was what was supposed to be done. now a guy thinks it is enough to take a girl out ONE TIME and she will put out. news flash it’s not. i am not saying a girl will drop her panties the second you open the car door for her, but i am pretty sure you will get a lot farther if you treat a girl like a lady rather than making it completely apparent that you want to sleep with her. i have had this conversation with a lot of girls and we all seem to be on the same page, you might not want a girlfriend, but you still need to respect the girls you are trying to sleep with. if you have no respect for them, than you have no business talking to them.

i hate when my guy friends call girls bitches. why is it okay to refer to a girl as a bitch? we are people too. we don’t go around describing you to our friends saying “hey so last night i went on a date with some asshole..” or what about if girls just went around saying “daaaaaaamn look at that asshole,” all while grunting. we don’t do that and neither should you.

text messaging. or should i call it sexting.. there is a fine line when one should begin sexting a girl and when one should hold out. kinda like dating. a girl might give you her number and might be flirty with you but that doesn’t mean that she is going to send you a naked picture of herself. who started this and why do guys think it is okay to ask for one after three days of texting. no sorry that is not equivalent to three dates. you don’t know each other and it kinda makes a girl feel sleeeeezy. don’t get me wrong, everyone has their own prerogative, but i am pretty sure the overall consensus of my gender is on my side.

first hand experience: i started dating this guy. on paper he was everything you would want in a guy. before our third date he said the only way we would go out is if i slept over his house… so basically he propositioned me? need i say more, i cursed him out and never spoke to him again.

moral of the story? be a gentleman. i am not saying be a whimp, cause ew no one likes a softy, but open doors, walk on the side of the street where the cars are, hold a girls purse (and no, it doesn’t make you gay), walk her to her door at night, and don’t expect something in return. if you do those little things, you’ll get a lot further.. i promise.