two burns and a horrible stomach ache later

how my night ended, two burns, and my boyfriend having to cut my food for me, since i was handicapped. i know, i know, HUGE BRAT!

first i would like to start off with a suggestion, pinterest needs to have a please don’t try this at home warning under all images of food. with that said, i will tell you about my attempt to make a caprice dip with garlic bread, asparagus with balsamic tomatoes, chicken rollatini with spinach alla parmigiana (fancy, i know) and brownies for dessert. i don’t know if you know this about me but i can’t cook. no seriously, i can’t. i learned how to peel an onion during my third year of college, and that was ground breaking. eggs, i’ve perfected, well only scrambled, and anything i can heat up in the microwave I AM YOUR GIRL!

at this point i am sure you are asking yourself “why would you do that to yourself, and try and make a four course meal?” well duh cause i have a boyfriend and i need to let him know i can do other things than shop and complain. at least this was my grand idea around 4pm monday. did all the grocery shopping during lunch, i even chopped up the tomatoes, i was ready to take on my kitchen as soon as i got home from work. all i kept thinking was “go big or go home.”

what i should have done was order out. first i took out all the ingredients, so far so good. i decided to start with the chicken rollatini with spinach alla parmigiana (i love the name) since it took the longest. well after the third attempt of adding ingredients, then realizing i added the wrong ingredient to that bowl and it was supposed to go in another bowl, i finally got it… or so i thought. it wasn’t until i had to bread the chicken that i realized thaaaats why i needed the egg, and it wasn’t supposed to be in the spinach concoction i made. whoops, hope he doesn’t notice. as i stare at the chicken, which the directions clearly said i wouldn’t need toothpicks to hold them together, and that they would easily stick – yeah my ass, my chicken con spinach looked NOTHING like the picture. a perfect example of a “nailed it” image.

the chicken goes into the oven, and i start on the asparagus, which was pretty easy. some how i managed to cook the asparagus, prepare the mozzarella for the caprice dip and make the brownie batter all while the chicken was baking. I HAVE NO IDEA HOW WOMEN DO THIS! i seriously have a new found respect for mothers who work all day, and have dinner on the table for their husbands, cause that sure as hell ain’t going to be me. chicken is done. asparagus is done, table is set and all that is left is the easiest thing, the caprice dip, which at this point has turned into my enemy. the cheese wouldn’t melt, or it did melt but it all stuck together and didn’t quite look like a dip, more like a block of cheese. FAIL. now i take the dish out of the scorching hot oven and as i am doing this i almost drop the dish, so what is my first reaction “hey superwoman, the dish isn’t hot, you didn’t just take it out of the oven, lets just grab it with your bare hand.” obviously, i curse everything in sight, and promise myself I WILL NEVER COOK AGAIN! hmph. i mean it’s not for everyone right. some people can’t swim, others can’t ride a bike, i can’t cook. there i said it, I CAN’T COOK!

my boyfriend was a good sport, and ate the food with a smile on his face.  he did inform me that he woke up in the middle of the night with the worst stomach ache of his life… oh well, at least he didn’t die. (as you can tell i am the cup half full kinda girl) but i now have two of the worst burns i have ever had in my life, the food kind of resembled food, and i did not have to call miami-dade fire rescue, so i guess that’s a plus.oh wait, and my boyfriend told me i never have to cook for him again, mission accomplished.

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this i promise you.

oh heyyy, did you think i forgot all about you, because i haven’t! we can blame my slight hiatus on my busy life. haha don’t i wish that was true, i blame it on the mere fact that nothing has interested me lately. no matter how tacky someones outfit has been or how annoying men are, they just have not reached that importance for me to write about. damn you writers block, damn you! well this busy life i am oh so quick to brag about has picked up and is becoming quite the exciting one. for starters, after countless interviews, trying to find a social media or pr job (which, was not an easy process, and definitely bruised my ego a little), i finally found one! i have traveled all across south florida, had a phone interview for a company in boston and one in chicago, to think “hell yeah i dominated that interview. for sure i am getting THIS job,” i finally was able to say it and well, it come true! this girl is EMPLOYED!  for those out there trying to find work, i completely understand. those who have a job, don’t take it for granted. nothing is worse than going out and shopping and seeing your bank account just quickly diminish. thank god my responsibilities are limited and i was able to stretch my money for as long as i could. expect when it came to my shopping addiction, no matter how broke i am i find myself at the mall.. ask me how i got there and i can’t tell you, it is like my car is on auto pilot and just takes me there – I SWEAR!

so this exciting life i mentioned, bet you are wondering what is so exciting about it. well, after about 7 years of my friends trying to get me to go to utlra, telling me i will have by far the best time of my life…. i finally went. fine… they were right. maybe not about ultra but about swedish house mafia. completely obsessed at the moment. i can’t stop talking about, thinking about, dreaming about it. i have never been one to be a fan of house music, but after this past weekend…. i have this new found love.

so besides ultra, and my new job, my life has consisted of, well… the gym and going out… and maybe pinterest. i have now planned out my wedding, my dream home, along with closets a girl could only dream of,  filled with clothes and purses i hope to one day afford. although, those are not excuses for me to have stopped writing… i have and i am sorry. i promise i will continue, if not for those who follow me, but for myself. writing is my outlet, i forget about what is going on around me and just let my fingers do the typing. (you wouldn’t believe some of the stuff they say, haha). people tend to put the things they love to do on the back burner because this thing called life gets in the way. moral of the story, if you love doing something, make time for it. this is my april resolution, who says you need to start jan. 1?

follow me on pinterest to see more of what i like, fitness tips, what i want to make, and what i hope my life will one day be!