quickly losing faith in humanity..

We hear about shootings every day. Everyday something happens around the world that leaves me in awe, but today, today for some reason it hit home. I got to work like I normally do, opened Facebook only to find my timeline flooded with footage, images and articles of two journalists who were shot and killed in Virginia.

cnvluwrukaao-bl-1These two journalists were my age. They were doing a job they loved and their lives were taken for what reason?  ALL LIVES matter. Not any specific color, not any specific gender, religion, sexual orientation, whoever the fuck you are, whatever you believe in, you deserve to live. You deserve to die at an old age, not because you were shot and killed while at work.

As an American, I live in a country where situations like this should not be happening.  Why should I be scared to go to work, to go to the movies or what is next, grocery shopping? I shouldn’t have to live my life in fear. When I have kids am I going to have to homeschool them because who knows what the world will be like in 10 years.

I just don’t understand how some people have so much hate in their hearts. Instead of every one arguing over what idiotic thing Donald Trump said last night, can we please find a way to eliminate the hate from the world. I just feel like with every step forward we take to make this world a better place, we take 15 back.

To the families of the two journalists in Virginia, I send my deepest condolences.

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please place the tiara on my head

i will do the honors and crown myself as the queen of online shopping, and no, not just online shopping, BARGAIN online shopping. of course, i would love to be able to online shop as if i just won the lotto, but i am not quite at that baller status yet, and a girl has gotta save, so i do quite a bit of online shopping. and by “quite a bit” i do mean every free minute i have. i love going to boutiques around miami and laughing at what they charge for the same shirt i found online. seriously, why would i pay $65 for a skull shirt when i know at least four different online sites (that i visit on the reg.) that are selling them for $24.99 – $32. ugh sorry, i’d rather buy two shirts for the price of one, if ya know what i mean.

but i am real bitchy about telling people where i have found my bargains. i have this theory that if too many people start buying from them, then their prices will go up, and that will totally ruin my game plan! maybe by the end of this post i will develop a soft spot for my followers and share one of them.

tip: best way to save with online shopping is to sign up for their newsletters. yes it sucks getting spammed a million times a day by countless companies, but most of the time, those emails contain lots of beneficial information. for example, one of the new websites i found, i signed up for the newsletter, as i browsed the website, of course had a cart full of items but didn’t actually purchase yet. sure enough i check my email a few hours later and most of the items i had selected had gone on sale, 40% off. that was music to my ears. i literally could have cried from excitement.

tip: lets say you fell in love with a pair of shoes on a website like sam edelmanfind out what the name of the shoe is, go to google, search the shoe (under shopping) and it will show you all the places where you can purchase that shoe, and how much. i do it all the time, and save myself SO MUCH MONEY!

tip: before checkout, google the website you are on, followed by coupons. sometimes you will find awesome coupons, sometimes you won’t, but it doesn’t hurt to check it out.

tip: social media does goes a long way. most companies give you a discount just for liking them on facebook, or following them on twitter.

so today, as i was doing my usual online shopping i came across this super cute tribal sweater. of course i look on all of my websites, since they pretty much carry the same clothes, and here is the perfect example of WHY you should look around before purchasing.

vs

 

buuut the best thing about tobi is you get 50% off your first purchase. ugh talk about a deal! – https://www.tobi.com/i/MzY3NTIx%0A

two burns and a horrible stomach ache later

how my night ended, two burns, and my boyfriend having to cut my food for me, since i was handicapped. i know, i know, HUGE BRAT!

first i would like to start off with a suggestion, pinterest needs to have a please don’t try this at home warning under all images of food. with that said, i will tell you about my attempt to make a caprice dip with garlic bread, asparagus with balsamic tomatoes, chicken rollatini with spinach alla parmigiana (fancy, i know) and brownies for dessert. i don’t know if you know this about me but i can’t cook. no seriously, i can’t. i learned how to peel an onion during my third year of college, and that was ground breaking. eggs, i’ve perfected, well only scrambled, and anything i can heat up in the microwave I AM YOUR GIRL!

at this point i am sure you are asking yourself “why would you do that to yourself, and try and make a four course meal?” well duh cause i have a boyfriend and i need to let him know i can do other things than shop and complain. at least this was my grand idea around 4pm monday. did all the grocery shopping during lunch, i even chopped up the tomatoes, i was ready to take on my kitchen as soon as i got home from work. all i kept thinking was “go big or go home.”

what i should have done was order out. first i took out all the ingredients, so far so good. i decided to start with the chicken rollatini with spinach alla parmigiana (i love the name) since it took the longest. well after the third attempt of adding ingredients, then realizing i added the wrong ingredient to that bowl and it was supposed to go in another bowl, i finally got it… or so i thought. it wasn’t until i had to bread the chicken that i realized thaaaats why i needed the egg, and it wasn’t supposed to be in the spinach concoction i made. whoops, hope he doesn’t notice. as i stare at the chicken, which the directions clearly said i wouldn’t need toothpicks to hold them together, and that they would easily stick – yeah my ass, my chicken con spinach looked NOTHING like the picture. a perfect example of a “nailed it” image.

the chicken goes into the oven, and i start on the asparagus, which was pretty easy. some how i managed to cook the asparagus, prepare the mozzarella for the caprice dip and make the brownie batter all while the chicken was baking. I HAVE NO IDEA HOW WOMEN DO THIS! i seriously have a new found respect for mothers who work all day, and have dinner on the table for their husbands, cause that sure as hell ain’t going to be me. chicken is done. asparagus is done, table is set and all that is left is the easiest thing, the caprice dip, which at this point has turned into my enemy. the cheese wouldn’t melt, or it did melt but it all stuck together and didn’t quite look like a dip, more like a block of cheese. FAIL. now i take the dish out of the scorching hot oven and as i am doing this i almost drop the dish, so what is my first reaction “hey superwoman, the dish isn’t hot, you didn’t just take it out of the oven, lets just grab it with your bare hand.” obviously, i curse everything in sight, and promise myself I WILL NEVER COOK AGAIN! hmph. i mean it’s not for everyone right. some people can’t swim, others can’t ride a bike, i can’t cook. there i said it, I CAN’T COOK!

my boyfriend was a good sport, and ate the food with a smile on his face.  he did inform me that he woke up in the middle of the night with the worst stomach ache of his life… oh well, at least he didn’t die. (as you can tell i am the cup half full kinda girl) but i now have two of the worst burns i have ever had in my life, the food kind of resembled food, and i did not have to call miami-dade fire rescue, so i guess that’s a plus.oh wait, and my boyfriend told me i never have to cook for him again, mission accomplished.

meet the parents part 4.

new relationships call for added stress. good stress of course. tonight, i am going to meet my boyfriend’s parents for the first time. this is not something i tend to do quite often, for the mere fact that the word boyfriend usually sends me running the other way. i am anti-relationships. anti-boyfriends. i like doing me, but somehow, i have found my way into a relationship and couldn’t be happier. besides the obvious, what if they hate me, what if we have nothing to talk about, what if more food ends up on my shirt than in my mouth .. situations that keep crossing my mind i have the what should i wear factor. of course i am sure i am not the only girl in the universe to stress over this, so i thought i would shed some light on this situation.

appropriate attire: jeans. blazer. blouse. flats. dress (not too short/ not too tight). long skirt.

inappropriate attire: shorts. flip flops. too much cleavage. clubbing attire. stripper heels.

if your nails are chipping, take the polish off. ALL OF IT. should you take something? YES! something small. make-up, minimal. do not look like you are going out with your girlfriends to pick up some guys, remember you have a man now, time to be conservative.

 

Imagejuicy jeans, michael kors clutch, blowfish flats, h&m blouse.

 

as i type this my heart is beating probably a million miles a minute. it is the type of nervous i get when i have to speak in front of a group of people 15+. as an outgoing person, this is weird.. i never get nervous but right now, i can barely breathe. i will most likely take a brown bag with me, so if need be, i can hyperventilate into that. wish me luck.

oh heyyyy

hello. long time no see, AGAIN. every time i get on this thing i feel like i am apologizing for being such a horrible blogger. (that is because i am… at this point i am averaging about one post every three weeks.) i have just been oh so busy. new job. new boyfriend. friends. weddings. time just seems to be slipping right out of my hands. i wish i had a day where i can just sit at home all day and do everything i keep finding on pinterest, blog and watch tv. work consumes my life. then its the gym. then it is finding time to be with my family, bf and friends. oh and of course there is this thing called sleep. but at this point, who needs it. i am lucky if i get to sleep 6 hours a night.

this is me dropping a quick hello… so hello ;]

you ain’t sexy, and i know it.

what is it about men that gives them this utter confidence to think they are hot shit and can just do as they please. i am in disbelief right now and hope that i am not the only one. you go out, you meet a guy, you have great conversation, you then give him your number.. if he calls, he calls, if he doesn’t who cares. (at least that’s how i look at it..) so lets just say this guy does end up contacting you the next day…. you exchange a few texts, ya know … no biggie. day two of texting rolls around and after the “hello, how was your day text” you receive a picture.. and no not of him smiling, or of one of those funny/sarcastic ecards that one loves to receive (hint.. hint). this picture was of  him without his shirt on. WHAT THE FUCK? seriously? one, i did not ask for you to send me this picture, two i could have definitely done w. out it, unless you are sporting a six pack that looks absolutely delish (please refer to picture A below), then do not send shirtless pictures of yourself to anyone besides yo mama – unless, of course one asks for them.

the worst thing about this entire situation, is that this isn’t the first time a guy has done this. just because a girl has a conversation with you, DOES NOT MEAN SHE WANTS TO BONE YOU. i can’t grasp the way a man thinks. i just don’t get it. am i crazy? is it me who feels that this is completely uncalled for and out of line? are girls doing this? are they just sending pictures of themselves half naked saying “hey check it out, i just went HAM at the gym,” cause if they are, ladies please put your shirts back on and take one for the team. if i see one more unattractive picture sent to my cell phone i might have to gouge my eyes out.

picture a:

sexy six pack ryan gosling

point is, if you look like this, then please mass text me every shirtless picture you take. but if you don’t, then keep it to yourself. THANKKSSS.

balls to the wall

as a woman we have essentials that we carry around with us everywhere we go. we have our wallets, cell phones, keys, four different pens, gum, headphones, sunglasses, lady products and of course make-up (because you never know where you are going to end up). we try to organize things so that way we don’t have everything just floating around our purses. wallets for our cash and credit cards, make-up cases for our well make-up, pencil cases for our pens, i mean really the list can go on and i am pretty sure you get the picture. but we have these things to make our lives easier.

now, let me introduce you to probably most practical product ever made for a woman. trust me, after i tell you what it is you are going to go out and buy it. swearZ. and the product is…. lip balm. haha i know, this was probably invented in the medieval times, but this isn’t like any other lip balm. this lip balm was made for the woman who has a purse bigger than a suitcase, for the woman who travels with her life but can never seem to find anything in her purse… and you can thank me later. it is called eos, it comes in a variety of flavors and is shaped like a ball, hence the ease of finding it in any size purse. i think the convenience factor outweighs every thing else, because it literally saves me from having to stop everything i am doing to then stick my head in my purse to search for my lip balm that can easily be mistaken for lipstick, pens, crayons, markers, liquid eye liner, a roll of pennies (don’t ask). i mean how many ball-shaped objects do you have in your purse? EXACTLY!

okay so why should you run out to cvs and buy it? one. convenience. two. it is organic. three. it moisturizes your lips. four. conversation starter. (i have had almost every flavor of this balm and no matter where i am, no matter what color the little egg-shaped lip balm is, i always get stopped and asked about it. the first thing i tell them is… CONVENIENCE – GO GET IT!!) five. i love mint, and their mint lip balm is, well, the shit.

yolo thats my motto.

three hundred sixty-five days ago, i started my blog. this blog. i never thought people would actually take the time to read what i had to say. i don’t think you understand how excited i get every time i get a new subscriber, which i would like to say THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SUBSCRIBING, especially cause i didn’t have to harass you to do so! i have had over 8,000 views, which i am still in awe about. i want to thank each and every person who has come to my page, whether you’re my friends and family, acquaintances, or even complete strangers, you really don’t know how much it means to me.

this past year i have learned a lot about myself. i learned that i love to write. never in a million years would i have considered ever being a writer, but it has become an obsession passion. if it’s not my occupation, it will definitely continue to be my hobby. i have learned things happen when you least expect them to. i learned i can be strong and weak, happy and sad, a bitch and a sweetheart all within seconds of each other. i figured out that i am still one crazy girl who has a lot to learn when it comes to men. i have traveled and saw cities i had never seen. i have been spontaneous. i learned you cannot take friends for granted, because just as fast as they come they can go. i learned your family will always support you and be by your side no matter what. i learned what i want and what i don’t want in a future job, and just like a man i can’t settle on a job that doesn’t make me happy. i learned i like seaweed salad and tuna tartar. i have realized i am a very difficult person and a lot to handle. i have discovered my love for earnest hemingway, two books down a million more to go, i have realized i don’t know how to save money and i desperately need help!

i am thankful for every single person who has entered my life this past year, whether you were a five-minute friend, lasted a little longer, or we are still friends, thank you for making my life just a little bit better.

thank you to my wolf pack, my friends who have and hopefully will stay by my side for a very long time, without all of you i would be lost.. literally. we all know how bad i am with directions. thanks for always making me feel better when i have had a rough day, thank you for listening to my bitching (which my god, i don’t know how you guys do it), for my tantrums, my sloppiness and thank you for just being a shoulder for me to lean on. i love each and every one of you with all my heart.

so here is a little something about me, taking it back old school.

1. Weird things you do when you’re alone
talk to myself. make noises. you know things normal people do.

2. How have you changed in the past 2 years?
i think i have learned to care more about other peoples feelings. fighting is stupid and i would much rather be the bigger person and apologize than continue not speaking to someone who is imporant to me.

3. What kind of peson attracts you?
considering the past, the qualifications needed would be: an asshole, only can only care about yourself, and be an alpha male. height is a huge plus. actually that wins me over 100%.

4. What do you wear to bed?
depends. panties and a tank most of the time.

5. 5 things that irritate you about people?
(1) stupid questions
(2) people who like to argue about things they have no idea what they are talking about.
(3) pettiness
(4) bad drivers
(5) poorly dressed people

6. The person you like and why?
person i likeD. why, cause i thought he was different. hence the D at the end.

7. Your opinion on cheating on people?
don’t be in a relationship if you’re going to cheat. be a man or a woman, you made a commitment so live up to it.

8. Something you are currently worrying about?
getting to the airport on time.

9. Your last kiss?
ive had better.

10. Your views on drugs and alcohol?
drugs, like pot, i find acceptable and no judgments will be thrown your way. anything else, i choose to stay away from. drinking… cheers!

11. Your current relationship/Discuss how single life is
current relationship would be with myself. i buy myself presents, and take myself out to dinner. i say cute things to myself, and we NEVER fight.. i would say my current relationship is going pretty well.

12. Things youd say to an ex?
those three years felt like an eternity. and youre toxic, but he already knows this.

13. A date you would love to go on
something spontaneous and full of surprises. anything but a typical dinner and movie.

14. Something disgusting you do?
burp. a lot.

15. Best thing to happen to you this week?
i learned to let go.

16. 3 things you are proud of about your personality
understanding, funny, outgoing.

17. things that make you scared
the usual scream mask, murders etc. snakes, sharks, bugs…

18. disrespecting parents
i’ve done it. i do it. i should stop. sorry mom and dad.

19. something that never fails to make you better
my friends, always.

20. the last argument you had?
it was stupid and with someone who i shouldn’t have had it with. if you complain about something one time, and that person doesn’t change, it is because they don’t want to. lesson learned.

21. something you can’t seem to get over?
i can get over anything..

22. 5 things about you people don’t really expect
i like to read, i am really shy when i talk in front of more than 5 people, i paint when i am sad. okay i know that’s only three but i am on a time crunch and thinking about more just takes too long.

23. something you always think “what if…” about
what if i would have ended it sooner…

24. things you want to say to 5 different people
i love you. thank you. how do you put up with me? sorry. goodbye.

25. 10 ways to win your heart
grand gestures & sincerity. but i guess ill just go with sincerity. the rest, i would rather keep it to myself.

26. your religious beliefs
i have none.

27. talk about your siblings.
i don’t have any.

28. the month you were happiest this year and why?
all 12.

29. a picture of yourself

30. what changed this month an what you hope will happen?
feelings. i wont get them ever again.

thanks mom&dad, i know you read this too.

steve broke my heart.

so today is off to a fantastic start, NOT. this is what i get for bragging about my super awesome sale… my ex best friend steve madden decided to let me purchase my beautiful shoes but then sent me an email this morning saying they are out of stock. pause, this is definitely not the first thing i want to see in the morning. maybe a good morning gorgeous, we ran out of your shoe would have sufficed, but c’mon steve, i thought we had a better relationship than that. you sent me a mass email (ugh!) then gave me a measly 10% off discount. seriously! that does not take the pain away… my heart and feet are extremely sad and disappointed right now and a 10% discount is not going to cut it.. especially when you got my excitement at it’s all time high then… completely let me down. steve, i might have to start shopping at aldo from now on, just saying.

moi, love thy self.

i love you, but i love myself more – sex&thecity

i don’t think i have dedicated a weekend entirely to spoiling myself. i mean, granted i have spoiled myself in the shopping spree sorta way.. but that’s not what i am talking about. i am talking about the spend countless hours of my day laying in a tub full of bubbles, reading the new book i just picked up from barnes and nobble (i go there frequently, hoping to meet my future boyfriend… you know the only place you can meet decent guys in miami… or at least smart ones). i want my fingers to be pruney and the edges of my book to form that wave it gets when the pages get wet. i want to sit in that tub with a bottle of wine and just enjoy me. i want to spend my weekend painting, which i haven’t done in so long! i want to lose myself in the brush.. and the canvas. i want to forget about everything and just think about nothing… does that make sense? every weekend for the past 2 years i have gone out, either to a party or to a club.. my body has been drowned in alcohol and it is begging me to breathe. so that is what i am going to do this weekend, i am going to celebrate myself. except saturday night,  i can’t pass up watching my gators play.

things i will do this weekend:
lock myself in my room and just blast the music.
catch up on movies (any suggestions, let me know!)
gym
bubble bath
read my new book
drink lots of wine
watch my gators play
no make up. let my hair down – lion status
sleep
bake something
do my nails
give myself a facial

and if i have time, organize my closet.

i am really excited ;x